The 8-minute tape was made for fun by PFFR and they shopped it around different stores. The USA Network eventually saw their tape and gave them money and six months to make a pilot episode.

Unaired pilot episode produced for the USA Network. The Letter N becomes depressed and self-loathing and goes on a quest to find herself.

The letter N, a recovering alcoholic, gets out of rehab but is still depressed and purposeless. Chauncey, the show's main puppet, hires S to find her, and he ends up seducing and impregnating her. She gives birth to a lowercase I, which gives her purpose. The family takes a picture together, spelling out "SiN".

Chauncey and a randomly selected child go to space in a rocket ship, but the atheist Chauncey insults God after going into orbit, causing him to blow up Earth. The child convinces him to convert to Christianity, which he does, allowing him to see God. God challenges him to a game of rock paper scissors to restore Earth. Chauncey wins, and God, overcome by the pain of the first loss of his life, commits suicide. Hungry, Chauncey eats his body.

Unintelligent puppet Him's father dies, and he leaves behind a treasure map that the puppets sail across the ocean to find. They discover that it is a chalice of liquid imagination, which Chauncey drinks and becomes addicted to. He drinks so much that he drains the color out of the world, but Tyler, "America's Most Perfect Child," restores it and reveals that Chauncey had been drinking tap water and the real imagination was inside all of them.

Numbers and letters declare war on each other, although J and 8 fall in love. They announce their affair in hopes of stopping the fighting, but this only makes both factions angrier. They plan to commit suicide together, but 8 tricks J and lets him die as he declares a victory for the numbers.

Trees and plants begin to falter as Mother Nature decides to undergo a sex change operation, selling nature to a corporation to pay for it. Chauncey visits her to try and change her mind, but instead watches as she removes her female genitalia and prepares to attach male organs, only to die on the operating table. Chauncey has sex with her discarded genitals, reviving her and leaving her with no memory of what happened.

Expecting number 1 to show up to the show, Chauncey is angered to discover that 2 is there instead. He berates her, making her decide to commit murder on television to come popular. She kills a beetle, but Chauncey says it is only the second most impressive thing he has seen, and so she decides to commit suicide. She survives with dire need for reconstructive surgery, and Chauncey turns her into 0, ensuring that she will never be on the show again.

Wordsworth, a nerdy puppet, gives a lecture on honesty, but Chauncey drops a tree on him to make him stop talking and gets him sent to the hospital. While there, he is diagnosed with "cooties," which grow on his body in painful sores. Him eats one and realizes they are delicious, selling them for a bountiful profit until he has a nightmare that makes him realize he needs to be honest with Wordsworth. He tells him the truth and prepares to kill him, only for Wordsworth to wake up, revealing it to be a nightmare. He realizes he has been crucified, and the entire episode is revealed to have been Chauncey's dream, having been bored to sleep by Wordsworth.

Clarence, a puppet that interviews people on the street about the episode's topic, is doing a lengthy segment on patience when the show broadcasts an announcement apologizing for the slow pace of the episode, playing the entirety of it in reverse before starting a new one about "speed" which is played with most of it sped up.

The obese letter P is shamed by Chauncey when she appears on the show to sing, prompting her to get liposuction and have her drained fat disposed of. As she goes on to achieve great success, the fat gains sentience and is initially lonely, although falls in love with a pile of feces. P decides to have her fat shipped around the world to feed the starving, and her fat reluctantly leaves the feces to be shipped out.

Chauncey prepares to use a time machine, but a cooler Chauncey from two minutes in the future comes out of it and wows the other puppets, taking them with him an adventure. Angered, Chauncey scours the dump for parts to build another machine with, but instead finds an abandoned baby. He tries to sell it to a Chinese restaurant, but instead gets the idea to try and dig to China when sees that the Chinese calendar is farther in the future than his. He digs straight into Hell, where he gives demons the baby in exchange for a cooler style, and he returns to Future Chauncey evenly matched. The two Chaunceys battle through time, eventually returning to the start of the episode and calling it a draw, only for Chauncey to stab himself in the throat to kill Future Chauncey. Wordsworth points out that he only has two minutes to live, but Chauncey decides it was worth it to have "two minutes of victory."

Chauncey invites the dim-witted Middle America onto the show to make fun of him, and he gets offended and demands to castrate the puppets as penance, the stupidity of which they find so funny that they go along with it. After the procedure, he burns their genitals, the fumes getting the puppets high and allowing Middle America to take over the show. He turns it into "Horse Apples", a lowbrow comedy full of Southern stereotypes, that becomes a big hit and makes him a billionaire. Jealous, Chauncey cuts the brakes on Middle America's hot air balloon, killing him and taking all his money.

The puppets pretend to be on a plantation to teach about history, with Chauncey as the slaveowner, female puppet Sthugar as his underage wife, and Wordsworth and Him as slaves. Chauncey orders Him to get rid of their electronics so the episode can be more accurate, but he eats them and transforms into a cyborg that can do intense labor. Sthugar tries to seduce him, but pretends he was trying to rape her when Chauncey catches them. Him's trial devolves into an argument about evolution between Chauncey and Wordsworth, where Chauncey brings a monkey into the courtroom to disprove it but ends up watching it evolve in front of him. Chauncey bribes the jury to vote guilty until God appears to them, blaming the monkey for their confusion, and the puppets lynch it.

Wordsworth invents a device that allows people to see into dreams, unleashing his own repressed anger on the world. When he refuses to fight it, Chauncey and Him shrink down using a machine Him made and enter Wordsworth's brain, taking control of his body and making him fight his anger. The anger kills him, and Him is forced to give up a peanut to Wordsworth's inner child to revive him. Wordsworth declares that surviving a fight his made him more confident, but is shocked to see Sthugar, his love interest, is marrying his anger.

The puppets discover that a bootlegged version of their show exists, and Clarence kills the bootleg Clarence when he tries to do his segment in Clarence's spot. The bootlegs declare war and the two shows fight until the Sthugars convince them to stop, and they agree to split up the screen and let their shows run at the same time. A third bootleg show joins them, and all three shows air a cartoon at the same time in which a terminally ill girl requests that the world be destroyed in a nuclear apocalypse, ending all three shows.